Pro-Wrestling On My Mind

My heart briefly soared and then dropped back down with a dull thud at the end of the J4G vs. War Dogs match at the New Japan Cup final. When commentary started to get excited about a run-in to aid J4G, my mind immediately went "DOUKI?!" even though I knew it wasn't really realistic. Turns out it was members of Hontai, which makes sense after Tanahashi's post-match overture on 3/17. Tana offered the handshake of alliance/peace after chasing off the War Dogs and it seems like J4G are now a part of Hontai.  I can only assume this means Taka sold his backlog of J4G shirts. Tag Team Partner and I were talking about Tanahashi's initial offer to J4G and he wondered if New Japan is in line for a major stable reset. With Bullet Club fracturing, Hontai getting kind of bloated now that it officially includes Chaos and J4G, and even hints (at least in English commentary) of issues in United Empire regarding leadership, it seems like a possibility. Even LIJ has had a change, ...

Watching the New Japan Cup final, I realized something during Great-O-Khan & TJP's entrance.  If I tried to move any part of my body in the same way he twists and turns his hand, I'd probably end up in the hospital.   The next time there is an Addams Family live action project, O-Khan needs to fire his agent if they do not get him the part of Thing. He's demonstrated again and again that he would be perfect for the part. Although, I never have seen him snap. I'll be sure to ask him if he can if I ever get a photo opp chance with him. He needs a United Empire wristband. Or maybe a miniature towel.

Never thought I would have much in common with EVIL (except a love of Iyo Sky), but the New Japan Cup proved me wrong. GET OUTTA MY FACE! This may look like EVIL is posing majestically with a timely breeze adding to the scene by dramatically blowing his hair. What is actually happening, however, is EVIL is locking in a submission hold while some of his hair is sticking to his face and he can't move it because his hands are otherwise occupied. Thus, he is attempting, and failing, at the age old remedy of blowing it out of the way with his breath. Ugh, the number of times I have been in a similar situation, especially in the sticky and humid Japanese summers. Or when a hair has become weirdly positioned because of my glasses and I cannot figure out how to move it. So I huff and puff like an imitation of the Big Bad Wolf and hope my own damn hair will stop annoying me and fall back into place, but alas, it does not and I am forced to stop whatever I am doing so I can free my hands and...

Was ELP actually eating oranges while on commentary at the 3/15 show in Osaka? If so, does anyone have pictures? I want "ELP eating oranges" to be my personal "Bitch eating crackers."  

Catching up on New Japan Cup action today as I was able to work from home. I am on the 3/11 show now and I had to step away from my laptop because the timer went off for my spaghetti cooking. Before I left, only Walker Stewart was on commentary. When I came back, I became extremely confused. I thought Walker was doing a pirate impression, or perhaps an actual pirate had, for some reason, joined him on commentary. Turns out, that's just what Drilla Moloney sounds like. Fun fact to learn. For real (these are my dogs)* though, if someone told me he was related to the guy who sings the SpongeBob, I'd be inclined to believe them. On the topic of the New Japan Cup, I've noticed Naito reaching out to little kids to do a fist touch when he's heading to the back recently. It's adorable, but when did that start? I didn't think Naito was child friendly, or even people friendly for that matter. Is this what happens when you tag team with an actual ray of sunshine? And bless...

So Sanada debuted another homemade shirt in his losing effort against Yuya Uemura in the first round of this year's New Japan Cup.  That red font is giving major Disney vibes. Cold Skull better watch it or the Mouse might Skull End him in court. Can't Paradise Lock your way out of a copyright lawsuit. At this point I think we can safely assume what Sanada's favorite English swear word is. And speaking of Japanese pro-wrestlers who definitely have a favorite English swear word, Okada recently released a new shirt via Pro Wrestling Tees. Now, as I like to say to my students, It's quiz time! Who remembers the analogies section of the SAT? If you have no idea what I am talking about, congratulations on not having to go through high school in America or for taking the SAT in 2005 or after (and, if it's the latter, get the hell off my lawn you young whippersnapper). The analogies section gave you a pair of words that were somehow related and you had to pick a correspondin...